i fink me know hoo yoo'sh ish ๐ค๐ค
If you want to find out who stuck up Real News Today, go to Wonderful Words of Life before itโs too late!
can I be a penguins friend?
Yesh, DA FISHY SHPAM ISH DA BESHT! ๐๐๐๐๐คค๐คค
oo meesh likesh deh FOOD shpam. but NUT deh poshts
do u like spam i heard its made out of fish
๐ฅ๐ณ๐คค๐ deh besht bakin meesh had in uh WONG time! ๐๐
I hop dat aw uf yoo got out yeshterday and voted fa da pengwinsh ๐๐๐ I did ๐๐๐๐
๐ต hoo aw uu??? i didnt wealise i had soo manee pengwin wellitifs!!
ish a mishtwy...๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ
i confoosed...๐ค๐คจ๐ค if cheh and i's dint howd da Weal Newsh up, den who did? ๐ค๐ง๐ง
Exzactwy @A. TN3R, doe to be cleer, โe did not shay dat I vas dee stoopid penguin dat shtuck โIm up
@Markerman because Chair is a self-proclaimed stupid penguin.
Or whatever you want to call it. It isn't that common though, so it's uncommon.
Using my uncommon knowledge, that is.
@Hewwo Pengwin. I also haven't seen you in person, so I
can't say you do look like the other penguins. But, I can Prove that you do not look like the other penguins or any penguin at all in real life.
why did chair let the news publisher call him a stupid penguin
yes im markerman so idk if its for me to read
Glad to get that cleared up ๐
alsho, I vould wike 2 take FUW cwedit 4 witing dat awitcle ๐๐๐๐ aldoe i DEFWINTWY dint ush a gun on da newsh pubwisher ๐คจ๐คจ
Adolthf! ๐ฎ i'm appawwd dat yoo wood even TINK dat im a piggy in dishguysh! ๐ฑ๐ฑ imma da mosht PYOO BWOODED pengwen yoo coud eva meat!
mawkewman ith mawekewman ๐๐
weel newth 2day dooo i look like aw de udder pengwinth??? ๐ค๐
@markerman. The movies like "Angry Birds The Movie" 1 and 2.
It is a really great and awesome series, but I just wanted to know if your age would be fine for reading the series.
@markerman. I asked because I was going to recommend a book so you could find out what Roush and Shataikai are.
idk which penguin did it, they all look the same
I will โextewmunate aw duh wittew piggeseโ like u swaid ๐ง
Bwut I will impwament da โexterminate duh pigwetsโ law dat u pengwins suppwort! Unwess ur actwually a piggysh in disqwuise cwazy kid and chair! ๐จ๐จ
like which movies? peppa pig?
do i believe the penguin who held the newspaper guy gunpoint or the penguin with a rectangular mustache ๐ค๐ค๐ค
@Markerman. How old are you?
If I remember correctly, the pigs were the bad guys in the movies...๐ค
Why are there so many penguins here?
and Cheh! ๐ฑ๐จ yoo held da Weal Newsh Today wif a gun!? ๐ฏ๐ฏ i fot yoo wash gunna vire da money ๐ค๐ค
๐ฑ๐ฑ no vay doo we shupport yoo!! beshides, yoo not a capitawisht ๐ก๐ก
Vee do not shupport u!!!!!!!!!!!!
You ah an imposter !!!!!!!!!
U can twust me ๐๐๐
I pwomise evweyone dat I will make aw da white waws and make shure aw da big bad piggysh aw wocked up!! ๐ก๐ก๐ก
Yeeesss, vote fa me!!! U wonโt regwet it! ๐
A stupid penguin held me at gunpoint, so what else could I do? I had to publish it! I'm very sorry.
PENGWENS FA PWESHIDENT!! โ๐งโ๐ง Dish upcoming ewekshion, evweyone musht vote aw da pengwins into offish!! PENGWENS AW DA BESHT POLYTISHIANS!! ๐ง๐ง๐ง Dey make aw da white waws and make shure aw da big bad piggysh aw wocked up in jail!! ๐ก๐ก Dey awshow shtand up fa pengwen wites!! Yoo can twusht yo pengwen weadersh too bee twoo captitawishts! ๐๐ Show head down too da norsh and soush poles and VOTE FA DA PENGWENS!! DOWN WIFF DA COMMUNISHT PIGGYSH!! ๐ก๐ก
hey ive seen ur tv show peppa ur famous
Vy hashn't my awticle ben poshted yet? ๐ค๐ค Ewekshion day ish onwy WON WEAK fwom today! ๐ฎ Ve half too get owoo campain going ๐๐๐ง๐ง
๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ Ve ken't let da piggysh take ova!!
the whole world is made out of lego
peppa is made out of lego
ITSH DAH WORSHT PIGWET OF DEM ALL!!!!
Yesh ๐๐๐๐๐
I dont twust da piggy napoleon ๐ค๐ค
yesh, and pengwens white GWEAT awticles!! ๐๐๐๐ (foorshadoughing) ๐๐๐๐
u can write news with markers
a communist french pig anything goes
No
Sunday, Oct 30, 2022 at 1:02 PM
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No
someone give me a logical explanation for why a news group has been abducted by penguins, french leaders and markers
um, yesh ๐๐โน๏ธ๐๐
sharks eat penguins right
markerman needs to think this is hard
โe shaid, โI totawwy wonโt take aww ur ware markers 4 myshelfโ vhich ish sharkashtic ๐ฌ๐ซ๐ฑ๐ซ๐ฌ
I give you my word as a pig that I will not confiscate your blueberry markers and send you to the gulag. ๐๐
oh did i tell u i have a whole box of them ill get more right
i do really like my blueberry marker tho
i thought he said he totally wouldnt take them
But he shaid he wood take ur ware boobewwy mawker!!! ๐ซ๐ซ๐ฑ๐ซ๐ซ
free expo markers sounds nice tho
a nibble ?!? nibble on your sharpies not my expo markers
does anyone know about the new theory? the whole world is actually an interactive green screen!
scientifically proven!
but doont vowwy! dey vill beesh shafe und shound wif me!!
maaybeesh jusht a nibbl doe if dey shmelsh goood
mawkewman u can twust me wif aw yowa mawkews und i wont eetsh dem ๐
yesh! but wate ..... ishnt dat da game i pwayed awots??
(I totally wonโt just take all your rare markers for myself ๐)
Heโs a capitalist penguin, Markerman! Heโll have a monopoly on Expo markers, and youโll break your back just to afford a pack of them. However, if you join me, you can have all the Expo markers you want, for free!!!
Theeeeeee!!!!!! ๐๐๐๐๐
ok i can trust a penguin who knows expo is good for dry erase
i was going to trust napoleon but now i see i cant trust a pig who wastes perfectly good markers by eating them. dont want u to eat my rare blueberry expo marker when im not looking ๐จ๐ฐ
Expo ish good 4 dwy ewase. I Napoleon eating expo mawkers because heโs a pig
ummmm shawpees ๐ค i fink...
first what is ur favorite brand of markers
mawkewman u can twust pengwins we on yowa side ๐
i suppose other dry erase markers are ok but expo markers are the gold standard of dry erase
i do have expo wet erase markers but they arent satisfying for me to use and dont have the smell of dry erase marker smell
Trust the Roush. Not the shataiki.
Or other dry erase markers.
What about a wet erase marker?
i know i can trust my expo marker but idk about these penguins and pigs now
now im not sure who to trust ๐ค๐ค
โExterminate duh pigwetsโ sounds like penguinazism! ๐ฑ
Youโre supposed to throw the bomb after you light the fuse, penguin ๐๐
๐ฃ take DAT piggy!! ๐ก
Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
My bwain ish melting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Donโt let Chair deceive you! All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others. Chair doesnโt like the fact that we pigs are the most equal of animals.
Wun away eveeone!!!! Ish dah eevil pigwet!!!!!!!!!!!
Donโt trust these penguins!
Chauh u wote a weeley weeley goood awtickle! me TOEtuwee agwee wif u!! i haf a simwer stowe 2 tew ๐ข me deuw uncle cuzin Awthew went 2 duh zoooo und he seen a BIG BAD EVAL piggwet . he skweeem so woudwe me hewad him 2 inchiz uway!!! und duh piggie did nut evin say swowwy!! ๐ก so me sine duh puhtishin und shay extewmunate AW duh wittew piggese,!! ๐๐ท๐ฃ tank u tank u
u DEFINITELY want to twust deh capitalist penguins!!!!!!!!! ๐๐๐๐๐
i think ill trust a penguin with my credit card and social security number
communist pigs or capitalist penguins ๐ค๐ค
Opinion article: ๐ท๐ Pigwets Are EVIL !!! ๐๐ท: written by Chair:
Disclaimer: the opinions in this article are exclusively those of the author and most certainly NOT those of Real News Today. We apologize in advance.
Article: BEWARE OF DEH PIGWETS!!!!!! DAY AW EEEEEVIIIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you see a pigwet in your vicinity, RUN AWAY ASHAP!!!! I am shtawting a petition to exshterminate ALL deh evil pigwets because of how dangewous day aw! Jusht lasht veek, one of me fellow penguins wan into uh pigwet ๐ฑ! Dey wah nevah dah same agin ๐ฑ๐จ๐ฑ!!! I have never seen a penguin become so twaumatized after an encounter wif any uhduh being ๐จ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฐ๐จ!!!! If u luv penguins and hate EVIL pigwets, SIGN DUH PETITION!!!!!!!!!! Save deh penguins ๐ง๐ง๐ง!!! Exterminate duh pigwets ๐ท๐๐ฝ๐๐ท!!!!!!!!!! ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ SIGN DUH PETITION!!!!! ๐ง๐ญ๐ง๐ฑ๐ง๐ญ๐ง
Link: https://uquiz.com/quiz/7Pomge?Embed=False
Iโm not comfortable sharing that information
@Vera. Yeah, sibling do that sometimes๐
@TN3R. Do you have any siblings?
๐คฃ im assuming ur both siblings
You know how we have a bad track record of copying each other ๐คฃ
Roger...(from Wed)... you got a point ๐คฃ But that was probably subconscious ๐
Random Fact: A man made up dinosaur noises without hearing them..
Wow, that was a close coal.
I once almost accidentally started a fire, not too long ago ๐
I was getting ready to cook something on the stove, and I had already put the oil in the pan and turned the burner on, but then I got distracted with something else. ๐ฌ When I realized several minutes later that I had left the pan there, the oil was smoking, and it was probably very close to catching on fire ๐ But I quickly took the pan off the burner, and it didn't thankfully ๐
@A. TN3R, wow! ๐ @Addie, I think he means that there was just something that caught on fire in the house, but that didn't burn down the house ๐
You had caught something in your house on fire?
That was a little random..
Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire. That made my father very mad, as we didnโt have a fireplace.. ๐ฐ
i should have known it was u since u were the one who told me to not keep my marker vertical in the dogs for Jesus group like i didnt already know
@Vera, the storyline just sounds too similar to my article about the man sentenced to life imprisonment for not feeding his cat ๐
Ohhh!...๐ So it was Henry who made the two other "science" alts ๐
Actually, I havenโt been any of the โscienceโ alts in this conversation
And how's THAT, Roger? ๐ค๐
But all the confusion is over now ๐
๐
@markerman, yeah, Will made a double of my alt "science" ๐
Sounds like you borrowed quite a few ideas from my article, Vera ๐ค๐
Breaking News: Woman Sentenced to Five Years for Operating Soup Kitchen--Part 2: Ms. Lynn was brought to trial this afternoon, and swift justice was met. Judge Fleming sentenced her to five years in prison.ย
The distinguished Mr. Mickey Basher, millionaire and CEO of the clothing store Rats & Tats stated after hearing the ruling, "I couldn't have done better myself. Judge Flemming did an outstanding job. Anyone who would ever consider doing what Ms. Lynn did this afternoon better think twice. We will not tolerate her inconsiderate, damaging, and hateful practices in our community."
A few minutes later, he was overheard confiding with a dry laugh to a fellow bystander, "I mean, who in his right mind would even ponder giving a dime to those leeches? It could much better be used somewhere else."
Meanwhile, Ms. Lynn's team is protesting the judge's decision, and they are planning to make an appeal soon.
Breaking News: Woman sentenced to five years for operating soup kitchen: Twelve yesterday noon, officials were notified of suspicious behavior taking place at the storefront church on the corner of Fairfield Dr. and Equity Ln.ย
Ms. Wheezy Withers called to report that already eight ragged homeless people had wandered into the building which advertised free hot food and temporary shelter from the blistering cold day.ย
Within minutes, swarms of policemen surrounded the church, guns at the ready in case of resistance. "People in this sort of operation are completely unpredictable, so you can never be too careful," stated Lt. Harris Nutter.
Had the door not already been unlocked, four specially trained officers were nearby sporting a battering ram to knock it down.ย
Over a dozen officers swooped into the building, finding and apprehending Sarah Lynn, operator of the soup kitchen, putting her in handcuffs.ย
This sent the church group into an uprising as they shouted that the police's actions were unjustified.ย
Ms. Withers, commented on the crowd's unruly behavior. "That's what happens when we allow such unwarranted actions as feeding those disgusting pests. All they want is to ride on other's coattails and feed off their paychecks. And if they can't have it, they whine and whine."ย
Lol! ๐คฃ And Will, that article is ๐๐
and i just realized will baited me into that marker question on mgw for his friend the so called real news today ๐๐๐๐
o wait there are 2 other science
who the other science person then if he not roger or will
Ah man ๐ I had a feeling that that emoji might make my identity too obvious ๐ I guess I tend to use that emoji quite a lot ๐
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 2:42 PM
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FACT: My personality must be too obvious. ๐ Goodbye. You're welcome.
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 2:25 PM
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And you're welcome
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 2:24 PM
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FACT: If Will can correctly guess who I am on the first try, then I will leave.
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 2:18 PM
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FACT: This is getting out of hand. You're welcome
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 2:10 PM
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FACT: Facts can be confirmed as true by proof while opinions cannot. A โrightโ opinion is an opinion in itself and thus is not a fact. Youโre welcome.
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 2:10 PM
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FACT: I give you my thanks, REAL SCIENCE. Youโre welcome.
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 1:53 PM
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FACT: I am REAL SCIENCE. Youโre welcome.
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 1:26 PM
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FACT: Someone is now trying to copy me, but they obviously couldn't find the same font I used for the word "Real". You're welcome.
Monday, Sep 26, 2022 at 12:13 PM
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FACT: Opinions are facts: only the right opinions though. Youโre welcome.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 11:28 PM
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FACT: I'm now "REAL SCIENCE", just so that you don't get us confused. You're welcome.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 11:17 PM
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FACT: That last statement was more of an opinion than a fact, lol.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 11:15 PM
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FACT: That was a very good writeup on markers. You're welcome.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 11:12 PM
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FACT: If someone happens to incorrectly use a permanent marker on a whiteboard, you canโthrough scienceโerase that permanent marker writing by writing over it with a dry erase marker, and then erasing it with a dry eraser or cloth. The solvent in the dry erase ink breaks down the pigment from the permanent marker, and the oily silicone polymer from dry erase ink bonds to it, effectively making the once permanent marking erasable. Youโre welcome, again.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 11:01 PM
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FACT: Permanent markers are not dry erase markers, which is why they are called โpermanent markers,โ and therefore any sensible person should not use them on a whiteboard or any dry erase surface. We have Expo dry erase markers for a reasonโuse them. Youโre welcome.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 10:48 PM
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FACT: Iโm science. Youโre welcome.
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 8:10 PM
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And oh yes: you're welcome
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 8:09 PM
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FACT: I'm someone that you all know and trust; so don't worry, I'm just having some fun ๐
Sunday, Sep 25, 2022 at 8:08 PM
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FACT: All my posts just got deleted. You're welcome
Theyโre not turning the sharpies into expo markers, are they? ๐จ
๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ฏ real news ๐๐๐
@RNT, how was markerman supposed to know that you asked him for comment on that group? ๐
Lol, funny article ๐๐
If you go to the Paradox Academy group, you will see we did ask you to comment prior to publication.
comment: permanent markers have an acrylic polymer while expo markers have oily silicone polymer ! they are two different types of markers and cant be the same ! permanent markers are good for other things like on paper but the expo marker is the only way for whiteboards as it it the gold standard of dry erase !! the two types of markers were designed and made for different purposes !!! markerman out
real news took my words out of context !?! ๐๐คฏ๐๐คฏ
Breaking News! Markerman Claims Writing With Permanent Markers On A Whiteboard Is โno problem.โ
Article: Resident expert on expo markers and member of the famous BM group Memorize Godโs Word, just said in a shocking statement that โit (sic) no problemโ if you write with permanent marker on whiteboards. Longtime school teacher Melgahma Therple had thoughts, โIโve got students who writing with permanent markers on whiteboards all the time now!โ She said passionately, โI canโt see anything I write on them anymore, and I have to spend hours erasing them!โ Ms. Therpleโs experience is not an isolated one. In fact, schools everywhere have recorded an increase in permanent marker use on whiteboards with incidents soaring as much as 100%. โThis is a clear case of how markerism is still rampant in our society.โ said the new progressive principle of Duport High School in Delaware, Steve Stuckup, โwe stand against all forms of hate against markers and will continue to advocate for equality of the markers even if that means a permanent marker can identify as an expo!โ We are not sure how Principle Stuckupโs solution is going to decrease permanent marker use on whiteboards, but it sounds really good. Markerman did not respond to our request for comment.
DUDE THE QUEEN DIED 14 hours ago
Breaking News: Philosopher Shocks Interviewer With Real Reason People Choose to Sin. Article: One of our esteemed staff members interviewed the renowned philosopher and theologian Bertrand Purcell this afternoon. After making little headway on the reasons why olive oil is better than butter, we brought up the question of why people sin. His answer is sure to shock you as much as it did us. โWell,โ said Bertrand Purcell wisely, โsin is a very difficult subject and the reasons people sin are quite varied. But I think most people sin because they want to.โ โReally?โ Said our interviewer dumbfounded, โwhy would anyone want to sin against an all-powerful, perfect, and loving God?โ โI know it sounds strange,โ said the venerable philosopher mindfully, โand Iโm sure none of you would ever dream of displeasing a wonderful God like ours. But when it comes down to it, I canโt see any other reason why people would sin other than that they have the desire to do so.โ Our honorable interviewer is now in therapy following a mental breakdown while grappling with the state of the human condition. He will hopefully rejoin our staff once he stops muttering, โHow? How could they want to?โ at awkward moments.
NeW aRtiCLe CoMinG SOoN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow, this group is made up of 64 percent alts ๐
๐
You are invited to "ByProPublishings" https://biblememory.com/group/app/bfec35d71d/
you will have to wait and seeโฆโฆ
what is the article about?
Hmmm...who are you? ๐ง Will? Dante?? ๐ค๐
A New Article Is Cominโ Your Way ๐ซต๐ป
@Will, I'm not an expert on shareholders and businesses and stuff, but here's something I found about them that shows the point I'm trying to make: "A shareholder who owns a majority stake clearly controls the company, but even small shareholders can wield influence, individually or collectively, through their shareholder rights." So, even tho the shareholders may not necessarily OWN the companies they invest in, I'm sure they have a measure of control over them.
Lol, those are some hilarious articles ๐คฃ
Update: This evening, Luis Acรฉleste disappeared from his manor style house today without a trace. Neighbors reported seeing a large saucer shaped vehicle with lime green light emanating from the bottom hovering over Acรฉlesteโs house. We are not sure what happened, but stay tuned for more updates.
Breaking News: Scientist Positive Finding Aliens On Other Planets Will Disprove Christianity For Some Reason. Article: During yesterdayโs Annual Astronomy Festival, local astronomer, Luis Acรฉleste, announced to an adoring crowd of media fans that finding intelligent life on other planets will disprove Christianity forever. โChristians think humans are so special they even think theyโre made in the image of a god or something,โ said the very informed Acรฉleste, โonce we find extraterrestrials, and mark my words we will find them, then weโll finally prove without a doubt that humans are not special at all and are really just animals. Not some weird image bearing thingamajigs.โ He went on to show several mocking comics in his exquisite PowerPoint presentation slideshow to illustrate his point while somehow missing the fact that the Bible doesnโt say anything about whether or not intelligent life exists on other planets.
nEw ArTiCLe CoMiNg sOoN!!!!
@Roger, sorry, I just watched it. It sounds worrying until you see they're mutual funds/investment companies. The investment companies don't own any of the shares that they invest in other companies, instead, their clients own the shares - that means Vanguard and BlackRock don't actually own any part of the companies they invest in. As soon as something bad comes out against one of the companies, they'll have a mass withdrawal and then they'll be done for
Breaking News: Methodist BM Group Chat Complains About Spammers Posting Bible Verses on Chat Wall: Article: Chaos erupted on a Methodist BM Public Group Chat, called โLove Everyone,โ after a user (luv4Jesus๐ป) posted daily Bible verses on the chat wall for a week straight. The owner of the group finally had enough when several other new users also began sharing Bible verses they enjoyed. โItโs sad to me when I think about how much time Iโve had to waste deleting these spam posts,โ said group owner AcceptanceIsForAll, โI could be using that time to memorize passages from the great modern prophet Robin DiAngeloโs holy text White Fragility.โ She went on to explain that she accepts people of all backgrounds, but cannot allow hateful speech such as applying โoutdatedโ Bible verses to modern humanity. โJust a few days ago luv4Jesus๐ป posted Romans 1:16 and explained that it helped her to share the gospel with her muslim friend!โ exclaimed an aghast AcceptanceIsForAll, โits just like how racist colonialists tried to force Christianity on everyone way back when. Instead, we should be creating a safe space, so that people can share their experiences, so we can know how to better love and accept them for who they are, not forcing old fashioned interpretations of the Bible on them!โ After several more hours of AcceptanceIsForAll lecturing about intersectionality, Real News Today was finally able to reach out to luv4Jesus๐ป for comment, she said, โI donโt get get whatโs going on here. I thought Bible Memory was supposed to be about memorizing the Bible. And discussing it in the chats. And this Karen thinks thatโs spam?? Imma stick to The Bible Brigade from now on, sheesh.โ Just a few minutes before publishing time we received an update saying that AcceptanceIsForAllโs account was deleted for spam reporting innocent users.
Especially about why my question didn't get answered... ๐ค๐ *hehe* jk kinda, but I'm still kinda interested to hear your thoughts on that, if you have time ๐
And Malidoes is also real, I think..
But to be honest. Selorixerzaster equipment is real.. And the Spicyesezor Web is real too.. Itโs the DARKER version of The Dark Web.. A. TN3R probably accessed the web, somehow..
Has anyone seen my wallet? It looks like this: ๐๐๐๐๐๐
A. TN3R is hallucinating..
Hmmm...a likely story ๐ค๐คจ๐คฃ
My fellow Co-worker (Aggent QZ) Managed to use the same equipment to teleport to safety.. But he didnโt teleport to Russia like I did. According to my Zalitez Watch, he landed in a lake in Austria.. The group of Selorixerzaster equipment is found in the seolo product which is filled with chemicals such as: Lazziosu, malidose, zepturin, juvenud and Jobueaz. The chemicals all mix together to make shantozes come to real life (shantozes means Teleport)
Could someone write an article about The Meteor that landed in the dessert which affected many mountains and a Spy base with many of my colleagues and co-workers were in it. They all exploded into many pieces and right now are laying in a casket. I managed to survive using super ultra-nilizers which costed me a few million dollars and they are only found in The Spictesezor Web. I grabbed 17 of them and stuck them to my heart, then I used their telisopicalerzit-matorzorixers to bring energy to them so I could teleport to Russia.
Oh ok ๐
...you haven't by any chance watched that vid I sent a while back, have you? ๐
Iโve been checking messages every once in a while but I havenโt been spending much time on it rn
@Will, are you still active? ๐
๐
I have 3 brothers, almost 14, 10, and almost 5
I'm the oldest out of 4 in my family
Oh nice! ๐ Yeah, we have a younger brother (13) and two older sisters (21 and 24).
I have two brothers, and Iโm the middle. You both have a younger brother, is that right?
Just curious about your siblings, like how many, and whether they're older or younger? ๐
Uhuh ๐ Probably picked it up from him ๐
I see. Yeah, my brother worked there ๐
Okay ๐
Just asking, cause on Sad Hour, you said, "My pleasure." I know I say that all the time at work, and ppl ask if I've worked at Chick-fil-A ๐
But it was my sister who worked there ๐
Will, random question. Did you used to work at Chick-fil-a? I know that sounds like an odd question, but I'll explain once you answer ๐
Dante, that's a funny article ๐
I made a list of writers @Dante. Oddly enough, @Bible Man wrote the second article in the group
Dante, remember. You CANNOT talk about Germany without telling me first! Jk
Nice article, Dante! ๐
lemme guess.. that one is called โKingdomโ?
@RNT, ๐คฃ๐คฃ that's a really funny one ๐
We think Bible Man is slouch's alt. he has been making guesses about who BM Police is and asking to enter groups he knows he is not allowed in. I was recently talking to him and when I asked who's alt he was, he left every group that I was in. that is why we are concluding that he is slouch.
Breaking News: Someone Attended An Episcopal Church. Article: Last Sunday, Bishop Ronda Wilder got up to preach like she did every Sunday morning at Hornsby Episcopal Church. But something was different this time. She looked into the pews and was shocked to see a person actually in attendance hoping to listen to the sermon. โI didnโt know what to do,โ said Rev. Wilder, โwe havenโt had anyone in our congregation for almost 5 years. I decided to the change sermon topic right then and there to something Iโm sure this man needed to hear.โ She proceeded to lecture her lone parishioner about his unconscious oppression of โgender minorities.โ โIt seemed pretty judgmental to be honest,โ said Jack Laundry who was the lone attendee, โI mean she hadnโt even met me before and sheโs telling me Iโm hurting her just by being there!โ Laundry assured reporters he would never be going back. Meanwhile, Rev. Wilder seemed relieved to have her empty pews back and began spouting off about intersectionality to the amassing dust particles.
New article coming soon!!!
The whole thing was solid but yes I thought that part was particularly funny
@Will, you thought THAT was the funniest part of the whole thing? ๐
you mean "has", not "had" ๐ค๐
Wow, Roger! That was actually pretty good ๐ Your writing had definitely improved from a few years ago ๐
โโฆ, whose reputation is a far-cry from what his name suggests.โ ๐คฃ
Of course, while the story is a bit of an exaggeration, it's not very far from how things actually are ๐
We saw a bumper sticker a while back that said something like "Abuse an animal, go to jail" ๐๐
Part Two of our Breaking News Story: Man Sentenced to Life Imprisonment for Forgetting to Feed His Cat--Article: The court convened on Thursday morning to hear Peter Whitlock's case. Presiding over the trial was Judge Fairhead, whose reputation is a far-cry from what his name suggests. After hearing the neighbors testify as to what they saw and heard, the judge was infuriated. He hardlyย even listened as Whitlock's defense attorney and the veterinarianย who examined the cat gave countless reasons why there was no misdemeanorย or crime committed. "We did a thorough examination of the animal, your Honor, and there were no signs at all of malnutrition or abuse," the vet stated plainly. "In fact, the cat was in very good health overall. We also discovered that the cat has not been neutered, which means it is very likely that its loud meowing was actually mating calls." In spite of the clear evidence, the judge was quick to come to a verdict. "I herebyย sentence you to life imprisonment!!" he bellowed. Mr. Whitlock was then hauled out of the courtroom and off to the jail cell again, amidst cries of opposition to the harsh decision. Others have noted with indignation that just prior to the court case, Judge Fairhead had let a serial killer completely off the hook. Whitlock's case will be appealed in a higher court, where hopefully, his sentence will be overturned. Until then, stay tuned for more news.
๐ I'd say. I'm working on part two right now, so it should be posted soon ๐
Animal rights activists be like:
Breaking News: Man Sentenced to Life Imprisonment for Forgetting to Feed His Cat--Article: Late Tuesday night, police were alerted to the sounds of cat meowing loudly outside of a residence in a small neighborhood. They arrived at the scene and discovered that the feline belonged to a man named Peter Whitlock, who was sound asleep at the time. Upon waking the man and dragging him outside in his pajamas for questioning, the officers learned that he had forgotten just that one evening to feed his cat its third meal of the day. Mr. Whitlock's neighbors, an elderly couple, who wished to remain anonymous, heard the cat, and immediately went to investigate the matter, then called the police. "Oh the poor thing must have been suffering dreadfully!" the old lady sobbed after learning what the apparent cause of its cries were. "I don't see how anyone could treat an animal so inhumanely! It's pure abuse!" The cuffs were slapped on Whitlock's wrists, and he was taken off to the slammer for the night, until his case could be heard. We'll be back with more in part 2 of this story.
Not yet, Iโve been pretty busy cause weโre helping my grandma move out of her house
Btw, Will, have you gotten a chance to take a look at that vid yet? ๐
I agree haven! very good pic ๐๐ป
Looking forward to it ๐, @Roger
vera i like your new profile picture lol ๐ itโs nice ๐
โWhether itโs a vanilla or chocolate cakeโฆโ lol ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ
Oh, hi Joshua ๐
We came on at the same time ๐
I'm planning to write an article sometime soon...I just have to find the time and the motivation ๐ And also it's going to be a satirical one this time ๐
Breaking news: Florida Man Blows Up a Mall While Trying to Bake a Cake For His Daughter. Article: Authorities in Lakeview Town, Florida are investigating a man who allegedly blew up an abandoned strip mall. The man claims he was trying to bake a cake for his daughter, but for some reason he tried to mix the ingredients with a leaf blower. He then proceeded to light a โstoveโ made of paper with his cigarette butt. The fire quickly went out of control and hit gas pipe that exploded the abandoned mall. โHeโs just lucky heโs alive,โ said Sergeant Burnie who was at the scene earlier today, โquestion is whether it was a vanilla or a chocolate cake.โ Investigators are not yet sure of the answer to this, however, they have promised they will do everything they can to find the recipe.
New article coming soon!!!
Looks like YouTube is blocked at the moment โน๏ธ. I'll try again when I can access it
Sorry, I had to. Iโll watch the vid this evening if I can ๐
@Will, I would like to hear your comments, tho ๐๐
Any comments or feedback? ๐
Special News Edition - July 5, 2022 [NOTE: THIS ARTICLE IS NOT FICTIOUS]: At some time or another, you may have heard your conspiracy theorist friends use expressions such as "the powers that be", "the Illuminati", or "the elite". But who are they even referring to anyway? Does such an entity exist? Well sit tight, because we are about to reveal who the global elite are...two giant corporations who control virtually every part of society on this planet: Vanguard and BlackRock. Now, to get to this conclusion, just follow the clues (aka, the money), and you'll see a clear pattern that shows who's really behind the scenes. Try it for yourself: look up the top stockholders of any major company you can think of, from Google and Microsoft to Burger King and McDonalds, and almost without fail, you'll find that these two companies, Vanguard and BlackRock, show up in the top five. It's these corporate giants' puppet strings that are controlling the entire world. And the elite families and individuals that run them are the most powerful people on earth. For a more in depth look, watch this short, eye opening video: https://tinyurl.com/36fm68ub. So, your friends' ideas aren't as far-fetched as you thought, eh? ๐
๐๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ
Breaking News: Tiny Speck In Gigantic Universe Reportedly Thinks He Is God. Article: The heavenly realms where put into hysterics when a tiny speck in Godโs universe reportedly called himself God. The tiny speck, a recently deceased human named James Doolittle, allegedly approached the throne of God and proudly declared with shaking knees, โI am God!โ God and His heavenly hosts have not stopped laughing for 3 years. Even some of the saints still ask each other, โdid you hear the one about the God called James Doolittle? Heโs so powerful his soul is in eternal damnation.โ followed by a chorus of sardonic laughter.
New article coming soon!!!
Hey, Will, I sent something on the vaccine group that you might be interested in ๐
Oh, I see now what the point of it is ๐
Special Addition: Orange Are Still Not Cats. Article: Outbreaks of felicitrurosis (a viral mental issue causing people to think orange are actually cats) are still ravaging the East and West coasts of the United States. Unfortunately, the disease is showing signs of spreading to other Northern states and also large cities in the South. โWe still donโt know exactly what is causing this disease,โ says medical expert and interfaith minister Mirada Moony, โso we are asking people to be very cautious with who they interact with and to carefully monitor their symptoms. In fact, it might be better for everyone to just start living in giant hamster ballsโฆ for safety of course.โ Other more controversial activists are advising a different approach approach: โI donโt think this โfelicitrurosisโ thing is a problem at all,โ said professor and pluralist philosopher Kyle Kook, โif someone wants to call oranges cats, whatโs the problem? We should tolerate peopleโs subjective experience of things!โ Prof. Kook was later seen pouring coffee onto a plate he called, โhis favorite mug.โ Despite the professors sentiment, medical consensus advises caution during these trying times.
itโs Canada ๐จ๐ฆ day!! !! !!
Ummm, Roger, yeah, I think you WERE freaking out with us ๐๐ AND I thought Dad squashed it with a rock? ๐ค
Lol about the article ๐
Breaking News: World Explodes After Politician Tells the Truth! Article: Just kidding! Our fact-checkers just determined the statement was actually false. Note: Our fact-checkerโs determination has absolutely nothing at all to do with whether or not the they agree with the aforementioned statement. Our fact-checkerโs are completely, one hundred percent dedicated to the truth and are not biased in any way! A few extremists have dared to question the accuracy of our fact-checkers in recent weeks, so we wanted to set the record straight. Rest assured, we rated all the accusations against us as pants-on-fire (worse than false?). We care about the truth and about moneโฆ I mean, our readers. Thank you very much for reading this!
I've met more ppl on Bible Memory who are from TX than any other state ๐
New article coming soon!!
Somewhere in Texas, but DFW is the closest airport ๐
...ok, now that I think about it, maybe I WAS a little skittish about the mouse, but hey, I was only 9 years old at the time ๐
๐
We've had so many problems with pests in the past that I'm not even going to mention all of them ๐ But at one house we lived at, we had giant roaches that were in the garage and house. Also, we had mice there. Well, at least one mouse. We once caught a mouse in one of the glue traps we had out for the roaches, and when we found it, it was still alive ๐ฌ My parents weren't home and everyone was freaking out (I don't think I was, tho ๐ค๐). But my dad later killed it by running the trap over with our vehicle ๐
Or somewhere in Texas ๐
Oh wow ๐
So you live in Dallas, then, eh? ๐ง
my flight was canceled two days ago and rescheduled for today
Iโm stuck in Canada trying to fly back to Dallas
We had a mouse in our house one time and I wasnโt scared of it yet my mom was trying to get us on the couch off the floor. the only time I saw the mouse was when it ran from underneath to couch and dad tried to smash it with his boot. ๐ We never got it so we put out a trap ๐ชค and found a mouse in it in the morning
itโs Canada ๐จ๐ฆ day eve๐!!!! !!!
It doesโฆ we had a problem with mice and rats. about 6,000 dollars to get it fixed
I costs hundreds to have people come and spray for house for that stuff
If my family moved, I would kinda miss my old house. Iโve lived in it for my whole life so Iโm attached to it a little. At the same time I do want to move though because my house is getting ready bad and no one is doing anything. ๐๐ I had to pick a dead grass hopper off the ground the other day and right away, there were to flat ones on the basement floor. I think they are getting in the threw the basement.
It feels hotter during the day, so we cool it down a little or jump on our pool
We got our heater/AC installed today. I think it is around 70...
My parents moved all over the place while they were growing up. Not so much now
So three(/four) houses I've lived in (for a long period of time) so far
I've moved twice... three times if you count staying at my relative's house for a little before we moved here.
Joshua, yeah, 8 houses in all ๐
But we've been living at the house we're at now for 5 years, which is practically the longest we've lived at any house ๐
@Evelyn, ah ok, well that's good ๐
๐
@Roger in the summer. I have a heater in my room so itโs much much warmer in the wintertime
Our basement is unfinished, so I wouldn't necessarily want to sleep down there ๐
๐
JJ, I've moved 7 times in my lifetime ๐
๐ But I've never had a room of my own.
Bc I was thinking we were talking about in the summer, with air conditioning ๐
@Evelyn, sooo...your house is between 19 and 16 degrees in the summer, or in the winter? ๐ค
Iโm hoping we will move soon. Iโve never moved before but I need to get my own room! Iโm desperate ๐
1: I would not have to share a room with my little brother anymore, 2: It would be easier for me to sleep, (because I canโt stand sleeping in heat) and 3: I could make as much noise as I want. ๐๐๐๐
I would totally sleep in the basement if I had the choice
my room is in the basement which is why itโs so cold. I have lots of blankets though so it doesnโt feel like 16
I think itโs the other way around ๐
If you look it up, you'll find that room temp is normally considered between 68 and 74 degrees Fahrenheit (20-23 C), so y'all are just crazy ๐คฃ
@Evelyn, ๐ฅถ yikes that's cold! I would be freezing if we kept it like that at my house ๐ And I live in NC!
Texas is way hotter then weโre I live and Canada Is a little colder. Iโm in Michigan ๐
@Roger 72 is hot for my house. my house is 19 degrees C. (Iโm in Canada so I go by Celsius.) at night itโs about 16 C
๐ Are you kidding me, JJ? ๐
For me, 72 or 73 is the optimal temperature for indoors. Anything lower than that is a bit chilly usually...
I canโt sleep in heat! My house is set at like.. 70 degrees all day and I would have it around 56 it it were my house! ๐ฅต
I like air conditioning. It helps me during the night ๐
Lol, funny article, Will ๐
Wow, Dante, you got your facts down pat! ๐คฃ
Winter is good for people as well. Studies show that people can think more clearly in cold temperatures. People sleep better in the winter, as well, because as people go to sleep, their body temperature lowers. While in the summer this can take up to two hours, it takes much less time in the winter. But maybe the most important reason we need winter is because of the way the Earth is tilted. It means it needs to be winter somewhere for it to be summer somewhere else!
Winter is good for the world around us. Many plants need shorter days and low temperatures to become dormant. This way plants can store up energy for new growth. If a fruit tree doesnโt have enough chilling time, it will produce fewer, weaker buds. Strong winters also mean fewer bugs. For example, mosquito populations, hiding outside as larvae until spring, are cut back by severe cold, too. This also helps prevent diseases that mosquitos carry.
Nice funny article! ๐ No thanks, I ainโt supporting Climate Change... Lol. In my dreams.. You know that without there being cold, humans and animals..
Opinion: Why You Should Support Climate Change - By Ida Eartha. Article part 1: Youโve probably heard that the earth is going to end in 12 years because of climate change. I donโt know about that, but Iโve also heard the earth is flat. What Iโm trying to say is that the earth is fine. Just fine. So fine that we should be supporting climate change! Why? Because heating up those naturally cold countries means more farmable and inhabitable land for us humans. It will also reduce winter weather so we can farm and produce food for more time during the year. Now, humans may not need more land, the earth is underpopulated as it is, but just think what a paradise it will be to have more water in the oceans and more inhabitable/farmable land?
Article part 2: So what can you do to support climate change? Well, to be honest, climate activists are making this very easy! If youโre going on a flight, there are websites that say which flight has the most carbon emissions. Just pick the flight with the most emissions and boom! Your supporting climate change! How else can you help? Drive cars. Doesnโt matter if their gas or electric because both cause a lot of emissions (gas cars from exhaust, electric from electricity generating factories). You should also get some cows! As any good climate activist will tell you, cow farts are high in carbon emissions, so we need more cows. And finally, support fossil fuels. These fuels lift countries out of poverty and keeps the economy running. And as a side benefit, they also heat up the world to better farm friendly temperatures. Hopefully, after reading this, you will be encouraged to do your part in supporting climate change.
Oooo this is getting intenseโฆ
๐ฐ - Breaking News: LDWNewsPress... 24 June 2022: Season 1. Issue 7: MURDERER CLEARED FROM ALL CHARGES AFTER SAYING ONE SENTENCE!!! (Part 6) Mr Saul Mando has confessed! He has finally admitted that he killed Jason Calotti. Police officers immediately escorted him to jail for him to wait until he is summoned to court. Moreover, we know the reason why he killed Jason Calotti... REVENGE.. Mr Salman Calotti and his gang had killed 22 people in the bank robbery, 4 of them were children of Saul Mando, and 1 was his wife. Statement to police by Mr Mando, "I call that justice! He savagely murdered 5 of mine! I have no one left! Those were the only children I had! And my wife was everything to me!! THAT IS REVENGE!!!" Many people remain shocked. Many are feeling for Saul. Nevertheless, still, he had no right to kill a human being. "Sheesh.. Peeps, I never knew that!" Posted Michael Jordan on Facebook. "I am having feelings for Saul Mando. All of his children and wife, GONE.." Stated Officer Right Jonathan to reporters. Tweet by Elon Musk, "I could not have ever known that... I feel for Saul." Reply by Lyndon Rive, Elon Musk's cousin, Cofounder of SolarCity, "Unbelievable! I am speechless... Saul still had no right to kill a pleasant person." Here are the names of the five children and wife of Saul Mando who got killed: Kate Mando, David Steven Mando, Kayla Mando, River Mando, and Page Mando. Saul Mando's trial will be held in Bow County Court in Newham (England) on June 27, 11:00 AM (England Time). Judge Wallace Cober will be sitting on the judge's seat. We will notify you when the court makes its decision. - Stay tuned for more news!- LDWNewsPress.. ๐ฐ
BM S-I-N Is Worthless (Fake News)
(Mysterious Lady At Little Joeโs Pizza) [Part 3]
Three months had passed and the officers on night duty (watching the jails) got tired of staying up all night and asleep all day. They wanted some sunlight. They figured that since the prisoners are already asleep, they could go in the back room and get some sleep because they still havenโt adjusted to there new sleep schedule. So thatโs what they did and in the morning when they came out, there were several more officers in the room then normal. They asked โwhat is happening?โ and the sheriff told them they were Fired for not watching the prisoners. He said โEvidence shows that the lady picked the lock with a tack from the tack boardโ and donโt ask me how she managed to do that, ๐ but what was important right then is they needed to find her! Several officers went out and others got on the phone to check if people had seen her or not. We donโt know if she will be found or not but we will give you more news on the matter in a bit. Stay Tuned For More News. (This Article Was Sent Out From BM S-I-N Is Worthless And Is Fully Sponsored By ..Only Through Jesus..)
Btw, โFelicitrurosisโ ๐น๐๐คฃ๐
Thereโs two more parts that I need to release..
Lol, I think Iโm fully aware that Oranges arenโt cats.. Xd
Special addition: Oranges Are Not Cats. Article: We at Real News Today have become aware of an urgent issue we felt needed addressing right away. That is that a disturbingly high number of people have been mistaking cats for oranges. We are not exactly sure why people, especially middle aged widowers, think the delicious citrus fruit is actually a fiendish furry feline but cases are sweeping across the East and West costs of the USA. โI am truly mystified,โ said psychologist and bird watcher Ida Knowles, โI held up a picture of a cat and an orange up for several of my patients and they all said they were the same picture.โ Some experts theorize that the confusion stems from the idea that words can mean whatever we want. However, itโs too early to make any definitive conclusions. Medical experts are calling the phenomenon โfelicitrurosis.โ
๐ฐ - Breaking News: LDWNewsPress... 23 June 2022: Season 1. Issue 6: MURDERER CLEARED FROM ALL CHARGES AFTER SAYING ONE SENTENCE!!! (Part 5) We thought that this case was finished. However, it is not! Officer Right Jonathan and Detective Mark William found some shocking information earlier today. Saul Mando, the person who was always the first to be mad at Mr Calotti and judge Naton, has been accused of being the one who killed Mr Salman Calotti's brother. So far, Saul Mando denies it, but the police do not believe him. Here is the shocking reason why Officer Right Jonathan and Detective Mark William think Saul Mando killed Jason Calotti. "Me and Detective Jonathan were stuck when we found this information out; I thought that Calotti killed his brother, but not anymore. I am 93% sure.." Yesterday, in court, when Carline Holler rightfully sentenced Salman Calotti to life in prison, people were cheering, but see this statement from Saul Mando: "This is what I call justice! That harm ลimdi รถlmรผล olan kardeลine sebep oldum was justice too!!" (This was mentioned in our previous article) People initially ignored that comment, but the detective and police officer did not; they found out that Saul Mando was speaking Turkish in part of his comment and translated into English, "This is what I call justice! That harm I caused to that brother of his who's now dead was justice too!!" Nobody knows at the moment why he killed Jason Calotti but currently, police are questioning Saul Mando. Tweet from Kevin Sorbo, a movie star in Hercules, What If and God's Not Dead, "Unbelievable! If Saul Mando killed Jason Calotti, we would have falsely accused him... a little.." Reply from Sean Austin, "Well, what do you expect. People who aren't trustworthy get accused of many, many things." This does not change Salman Calotti's sentence in any way; he is still going to be in prison for life. If we get any information from the police and detectives about Saul Mando, we will notify you. - Stay tuned for more news!-LDWNewsPress.. ๐ฐ
Iโm releasing part 5 today!
Umm, whatever you think best ๐
should I write part 3 or start a new one?
This article was submitted anonymously, so โHank Wordsworthโ is actually his real name.
Opinion: Credit Cards Are of The Devil! - by Hank Wordsworth. Article: In my day, people only paid with money we actually had. We used cold hard cash to pay our expenses! Now, everybody thinks theyโs got to get themselves a credit card. Well, Iโm here to tell you, credit cards are OF THE DEVIL! People be spending money they donโt have and piling on debt till the ocean runs dry. As a result, all these young people are slaves of credit card companies. True, credit card companies donโt ask anything of a person other than the money they borrowed, but itโs only a matter of time till they start making the REAL demands. Thatโs why Iโm asking you to join my all new credit card debt insurance plan. Itโs just $15 a month for life long protection against debts you canโt pay. If youโve got an unpayable debt, weโll bail you out so you donโt go broke. Call today at (666) 616-1313 to see if you qualify for our premium membership. Thatโs (666) 616-1313 for your premium membership to stay debt free, and tell them I sent you.
๐ฐ - Breaking News: LDWNewsPress... 22 June 2022: Season 1. Issue 5: MURDERER CLEARED FROM ALL CHARGES AFTER SAYING ONE SENTENCE!!! (Part 4) Mr Salman Calotti has been found in the woods unconscious by police; he was not armed but was severely harmed and in danger of dying. Police do not know if he tried to take his own life or someone attempted to kill him. However, after Calotti awoke, the police escorted him to court, where he was to be judged by Carline Holler. Many people were in the stands watching the judgement; Saul Mando, Elon Musk, Steph Curry, Lebron James, Russel Westbrook, Kevin Sorbo, Lee Strobel, Ray Comfort, and many other people from all over the world came to visit the judgement due to the first judgement ending shockingly. Calotti denied killing his brother, but no one believed him. He was found guilty of all charges and sentenced to life in prison... "Finally, that monster will get put away for good!" Cheered Saul Mando to reporters outside the courthouse. "This is what I call justice! That harm ลimdi รถlmรผล olan kardeลine sebep oldum was justice too!!" Many people are rejoicing today now that the killer has been put away. Nevertheless, many families still mourn for their loved ones killed by Calloti and his gang... Detective Mark William Said, "I am glad people are happy for the justice here today. Carline Holler is a real judge!" Police Chief David Ille reports, "Tomorrow, judge Naton Hanow's job will be taken away from him, which is being a judge. He will also need to pay a 7,500,000 dollar fine. If he doesn't, we will throw him in prison. This is all because he made that unjust decision on June 19th. Oh, and, if Nation, or whatever his name is, had sentenced Calotti to life in prison or death, his brother, who seemed like a nice guy, based on what Mr Mason Hanegoni said, would not have got killed." So Calotti has been sentenced to life in prison, and it looks like we will no longer need to speak about this Matter. We will be back soon with more news..- Stay tuned for more news!- LDWNewsPress.. ๐ฐ
Iโm releasing part 4 soon!
BM S-I-N Is Worthless (Fake News)
(Mysterious Lady At Little Joeโs Pizza) [Part 2]
I turned and looked around, scanning the aria. I saw the lady way down at the park. I ran for the park and suddenly, a bunch of police cars wiped around the corner and a cop jumped out and ran after her. One more got out and ran for Me! The others took off to the park. The cop told me my friend called them. The other cops were bringing back the lady. Once they got here, they checked her and found my wallet, and someoneโs keys. They asked for her bag and she refused. They took it from her and looked inside. I knew I wasnโt supposed to ask because it was police business but I asked what was in there. The cop looked up at me and smiled. He said itโs full of boloney. It took me a minute to ketch on but when I did, I had a good chuckle. They took her away and put her in jail and they gave me my wallet back. I said โThis city is the most crime filled city in the world!โ Stay Tuned For More News. (This Article Was Sent Out From BM S-I-N Is Worthless And Is Fully Sponsored By ..Only Through Jesus..)
Cool! @Real News Today, your articles are very nice! Do you use Grammarly??
New article coming in a few hours!
Make sure to take a look at these names carefully before you read Part 4 ๐๐ These are the people who got murdered by Salman Calotti and his gang: Nathan Clasman, Brian Ochorbee, Kate Mando, David Steven Mando, Kayla Mando, River Mando, Page Mando, Charles Ivery, Jordan Rick, Masonry Cal, John Dixon, Uriah Heep, William Hendricks, Cally Sam, Logan Founder, Natasha Johnston, Kobe Bicks Noom, Samuel Hernandez, Joe Paxton, Willie Lehay, Luke Paul, and Nate Lacider..
Part 4 and 5 is coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oooooooooooooooooo, spooky...
BM S-I-N Is Worthless (Fake News)
(Mysterious Lady At Little Joeโs Pizza) [Part 1]
โThis city is the most crime filled city in the world!โ Stated Joe after the incident. The cops asked him what happened and this is the story: โA man named Greg Johnson came to my pizza dine-in restaurant and ordered a large pizza with lots of toppings. When it was all ready for him, we called his name and put it on the counter.โ Greg stated: โI went to get the pizza I ordered and it wasnโt there! I saw a lady in the corner of the room with a big golden, glitter covered bag and she was holding on to it tightly. the pizza was on her table. I went over there to tell her that it was my pizza and she just looked at me. My hands were full with my phone, wallet, and a drink. I set them down on the table and picked up my pizza and had my friend with me pick up the other stuff. We got back to the table and I realized, We Didnโt Have My Wallet! I went back to the table and the lady was gone. I walked out the door and saw her across the street and she saw me too. She ran for it. I started chasing her down the street and my friend was on his phone for some random reason instead of helping me. I was gaining on her a little and then she took a corner and when I got around it, she was gone. Stay Tuned For More News. (This Article Was Sent Out From BM S-I-N Is Worthless And Is Fully Sponsored By ..Only Through Jesus..)
Btw, I have an article coming soon ๐
WARNING: SPOILER!!!! Donโt go down!!!!
Me Salman Calotti was found in the woods..
Probably hid in the woods for a few days ๐ค
He probably ran away.. ๐
๐Wow! how did he stay out of sight? did he get rid of all his electrics so he couldnโt be tracked??? ๐
๐ฐ - Breaking News: LDWNewsPress... 21 June 2022: Season 1. Issue 4: MURDERER CLEARED FROM ALL CHARGES AFTER SAYING ONE SENTENCE!!! (Part 3) After Mr Calotti was released from jail due to the unjust decision of Judge Naton, things went entirely quiet; people were not talking about the Matter as much as on the first day. Calotti has disappeared from everyone's sight, and the Matter was forgotten. Until Thursday morning, when police got reports of gunshots coming from a small house. Police and Swat quickly arrived at the house, seeing nothing but a dead body wrapped up in cloth.. The police summoned detectives to look at the area; bottles of beer, rats, ants and other insects were found in the house. Mr Mason Hanegoni has been living next to the house for years, and there was no problem; he said, "I have been visiting the owner of this house for years! The house has always been clean!" Detectives and police have identified the man wrapped in cloth as Jason Calotti, the brother of Mr Calotti (Mr Calotti's Real Name: Salman Calotti). Police are still searching for the killer; based on fingerprints and other information, detectives are leaning towards the killer being in the Carlotti family... Officer Josh Wheaton stated, "Possibly Mr Calotti killed his brother; why not? Eh? He killed 12 people without regretting it; what makes you think he could kill his brother without regretting it?" Many people are leaning towards Mr Salman Calotti being the killer, mainly because he has vanished from everyone's sight. "Maybe if it was not for the silly, unjust, 'judge' called Naton," Tweeted Lebron James on Twitter, "We would not need to be wastin' our time on this!" Reply from Zerekiah Hanow, "C'mon, why are you so against Judge Naton Hanow!? He has just made a silly little mistake!" Many comments have been fired against Zerekiah from Russel Westbrook, Cristiano Ronaldo, Elon Musk, Kevin Sorbo, David A.R White, Brian Bosworth, Steve 'sting' Borden, and many other celebrities and people after he defended Judge Naton. Police are still investigating the case. We will bring an update if we receive any new news..- Stay Tuned For More News!- From LDWNewsPress.. ๐ฐ
Interesting ๐ค Definitely reflects quite accurately the way things are these days.
FYI, the names of the 22 people who had got murdered: Nathan Clasman, Brian Ochorbee, Kate Mando, David Steven Mando, Kayla Mando, River Mando, Page Mando, Charles Ivery, Jordan Rick, Masonry Cal, John Dixon, Uriah Heep, William Hendricks, Cally Sam, Logan Founder, Natasha Johnston, Kobe Bicks Noom, Samuel Hernandez, Joe Paxton, Willie Lehay, Luke Paul, and Nate Lacider..
Iโll release it in 6 hours!!!
Part three cominโ soon!!!!!
Oooo this is exciting! part 3 please!
This is a good story! is there going to be a part 3?
This is the continuation. This isnโt really fake because this has happened in some places.
๐ฐ - Breaking News: LDWNewsPress... 21 June 2022: Season 1. Issue 2: MURDERER CLEARED FROM ALL CHARGES AFTER SAYING ONE SENTENCE!!! (Part 2) Recap: Mr Calotti robbed a bank with his gang mates, he had shot dead 12 out of the 22 people who had died, he was arrested, his gang members escaped, and was taken to court; he was found guilty but left the courthouse without paying a fine, due to him saying a simple sentence... Continuation: Mr Calotti said, "I feel offended you have arrested me." After he had said that, Judge Naton Hanow, allowed Carlotti to leave the court. This caused an uproar in the court. "How can this man be a judge!" Was shouted several times by Saul Mando. "Unbelievable! This man should have been sentenced to life in prison!" Was said by an older man. Many threads and videos have immediately been created on Twitter, Facebook, Tik-Tok and YouTube within an hour after judge Naton set Calotti free, all of them saying how unjust his decision was. Tweet on Twitter by Elon Musk, the new owner of Twitter, "This is wrong; I have no idea how judge Naton could do such a thing! In my opinion, Calotti should be sentenced to death!" Another post from Steph Curry, a pro-NBA player, on Facebook, "Look, people, Calotti is guilty! He should be gone! He murdered 12 innocent people. Moreover, he is going away without a single slap!" Nevertheless, Calotti is now free, and we do not know what he will do next...- Stay tuned for more news!- LDWNewsPress.. ๐ฐ
Oops yeah, the Queen is 96..
That latest article is very interestingโฆ I would like to read the rest of it!
@Dante the queen turned 96 in April, I think